Tag Archives: perfect

selections from Of Walking in Ice by Werner Herzog

Our Eisner mustn’t die, she will not die, I won’t permit it. She is not dying now because she isn’t dying. Not now, no, she is not allowed to. My steps are firm. And now the earth trembles. When I move, a buffalo moves. When I rest, a mountain reposes. She wouldn’t dare! She mustn’t. She won’t. When I’m in Paris she will be alive. She must not die. Later, perhaps, when we allow it. Continue reading

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SAS 9

IMG_7531 Continue reading

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my top ten albums of 2014

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Blacklisted — Neko Case
Chicago Transit Authority — Chicago
Chronological Calloway Vol. 1: The Early Years 1930-1934 — Cab Calloway
Do It Again — Röyksopp & Robyn
Dreaming of You — Selena
The Feast of the Broken Heart — Hercules & Love Affair
January 07003 | Bell Studies for the Clock of the Long Now — Brian Eno
Los Angeles 6/10 — Daedelus / Teebs
Lost in the Spectacle — York Factory Complaint
On the Water — Future Islands
Suicide — Suicide
World Psychedelic Classics, Vol. 4: The Existential Soul of Tim Maia: Nobody Can Live Forever — Tim Maia
Yellow mY skYcaptain — Paz Lenchantin Continue reading

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selections from Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami

If a pistol appears in a story, eventually it’s got to be fired. Continue reading

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All Delighted People

patterns, coincidences, joy, and passion? now i’m just making shit up. Continue reading

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love to love the stark reality of you, baby

the canvas is revealed, and instantly my own words come to haunt me:

i think writers love writing way too much sometimes.

do i stand by it? Booker’s bourbon deep within me or not, i do.

pasta sauce is on the stove, Tina’s yowling for dinner eleven whole minutes early, and here i sit, listening to strange jazz funk for those who were children in 1970. perhaps i was a child in 1970. perhaps i am a child in 2013.

immediately, my mind races to Natalie. lover, mother, sister, daughter. lover, liver, other, udder. lover, liver, killer, wanted. dead or alive, the love of my life.

i spent the past weekend not just with her but with my whole family. wedding #3. the best wedding, i would argue, but i’m biased because i love beaches. there we sat, taking up five of the nearly 40 chairs, on the beach in Avila, watching the two lovers dedicate the rest of their lives to each other. meanwhile, girls in bikinis, young girls, young boys, older boys, men, women, couples, swimmers, bros, volleyball voyeurs, everyone… looked on. it was us and it was them, and i certainly felt like them.

Screen Shot 2013-10-21 at 7.52.52 PM

the night before, Natalie and i had stared at our beautiful naked bodies in a giant mirror that took up the entire wall. while doing so, it dawned on me that narcissism was not reserved merely for individuals.

consider: a boy staring at his beautiful body in the reflected pool is narcissism. granted. likewise, a girl staring at her beautiful body in the reflected pool is narcissism. granted. however, the boy looks up and sees the girl across the pond, and he dies. struck with such immense beauty, an infinity times greater than his own, he stares and stares and stares and, at just the right moment when she felt his gaze, he looks away, only to look back and see her locking eyes with him. lust, granted. they edge the pond to share a conversation. the conversation leads to love leads to a later meeting leads to love leads to more meetings leads to love leads to… their becoming something of a unity. with or without marriage, granted, they become something of a one. this one finds themselves lying naked staring at themselves in a giant mirror… is narcissism. granted?

alas, as with the crashing waves parallel to my pupils, the tides do turn.

in the wake of the rainbow sand ceremony we had just witnessed, full of love and hope and happiness, i found myself plunged into the darkness of a quarrel with my love, who had found fault with some stupid words i spoke in the morning. i had apologized then, legitimately, but through my own prodding about some other subject after the wedding, had dug a hole that opened up the very same cavern of despair that i thought had been buried earlier.

but did this cavern really need to be so big? need the flames lick so high? need the darkness pitch so deep? i didn’t think so, but she did. but this writer had had enough of words. hopeless, stupid, careless, useless words. meaningless, pointless, hopeless. impossible.

so i stared at the ocean.

i stared.

and i stared.

and i gazed.

and i loved.

and i breathed.

and the mind wandered as it does but without words.

just breathing.

and loving.

gazing.

staring.

the waves crashed as they have for all time and as they will for all time. beautiful Avila Beach waves. beautiful.

stunning. impossibly perfect, gorgeous, crashing, perfect waves.

starry. star-struck, i was.

in love, i was.

i was.

i was, when my lover–now relegated to my periphery–caressed my face.

and at that very moment, i walked into my living room and threw Donna Summer’s “Love to Love You Baby” on the turntable. if you turn it up real loud, i realized then, you hear breathe in deeply before she starts sexily singing, “ohhh… love to love you baby.” Continue reading

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A Love Supreme

songs i can play pretty well, songs i can play pretty terribly, and everything in between:

“Au Privave,” Charlie Parker
“Autumn Leaves”
“Blue Suede Shoes,” Carl Perkins
“Boogie Oogie Oogie,” A Taste of Honey
“The Chain,” Fleetwood Mac
“Desert in E Minor,” brendan & ronny
“Get Lucky,” Daft Punk
“Gloria,” Patti Smith
“I Want You,” The Troggs
“Isis,” Bob Dylan
“Jitterbug Punk,” rich & ronny
“Jitterbug Waltz,” Fats Waller
“Lateralus,” Tool
“A Love Supreme,” John Coltrane
“Root Down,” Jimmy Smith
“Stand By Me,”
“Toro”, ronny
“Twist and Shout”
“Whiplash,” The Shells
“Wing,” Patti Smith

seventeen songs. before the start of the year, i probably knew five… and all terribly.

yes, i am loving my bass and my bass lessons and my bass teacher’s recommendation to watch a video featuring Bootsy Collins. i love my bass and i love jazz and i love Ella and i love Billie. i love the way Rich just jumps on the drums, i love how Natalie lives in perfect patience, i love how Lucas plays guitar from the minute you enter to the minute you exit, i love how Andrew and Mark and Sean all spin different dance tunes though dance tunes they certainly are, i love how Dorothy summons demons through her long tall throat, i love, i love, i love.

i love a girl. i love “Sea Surface Full of Clouds.”

I

In that November off Tehuantepec,
The slopping of the sea grew still one night
And in the morning summer hued the deck

And made one think of rosy chocolate
And gilt umbrellas. Paradisal green
Gave suavity to the perplexed machine

Of ocean, which like limpid water lay.
Who, then, in that ambrosial latitude
Out of the light evolved the morning blooms,

Who, then, evolved the sea-blooms from the clouds
Diffusing balm in that Pacific calm?
C’était mon enfant, mon bijou, mon âme.

The sea-clouds whitened far below the calm
And moved, as blooms move, in the swimming green
And in its watery radiance, while the hue

Of heaven in an antique reflection rolled
Round those flotillas. And sometimes the sea
Poured brilliant iris on the glistening blue.

II

In that November off Tehuantepec
The slopping of the sea grew still one night.
At breakfast jelly yellow streaked the deck

And made one think of chop-house chocolate
And sham umbrellas. And a sham-like green
Capped summer-seeming on the tense machine

Of ocean, which in sinister flatness lay.
Who, then, beheld the rising of the clouds
That strode submerged in that malevolent sheen,

Who saw the mortal massives of the blooms
Of water moving on the water-floor?
C’était mon frère du ciel, ma vie, mon or.

The gongs rang loudly as the windy booms
Hoo-hooed it in the darkened ocean-blooms.
The gongs grew still. And then blue heaven spread

Its crystalline pendentives on the sea
And the macabre of the water-glooms
In an enormous undulation fled.

III

In that November off Tehuantepec,
The slopping of the sea grew still one night
And a pale silver patterned on the deck

And made one think of porcelain chocolate
And pied umbrellas. An uncertain green,
Piano-polished, held the tranced machine

Of ocean, as a prelude holds and holds,
Who, seeing silver petals of white blooms
Unfolding in the water, feeling sure

Of the milk within the saltiest spurge, heard, then,
The sea unfolding in the sunken clouds?
Oh! C’était mon extase et mon amour.

So deeply sunken were they that the shrouds,
The shrouding shadows, made the petals black
Until the rolling heaven made them blue,

A blue beyond the rainy hyacinth,
And smiting the crevasses of the leaves
Deluged the ocean with a sapphire blue.

IV

In that November off Tehuantepec
The night-long slopping of the sea grew still.
A mallow morning dozed upon the deck

And made one think of musky chocolate
And frail umbrellas. A too-fluent green
Suggested malice in the dry machine

Of ocean, pondering dank stratagem.
Who then beheld the figures of the clouds
Like blooms secluded in the thick marine?

Like blooms? Like damasks that were shaken off
From the loosed girdles in the spangling must.
C’était ma foi, la nonchalance divine.

The nakedness would rise and suddenly turn
Salt masks of beard and mouths of bellowing,
Would—But more suddenly the heaven rolled

Its bluest sea-clouds in the thinking green,
And the nakedness became the broadest blooms,
Mile-mallows that a mallow sun cajoled.

V

In that November off Tehuantepec
Night stilled the slopping of the sea.
The day came, bowing and voluble, upon the deck,

Good clown… One thought of Chinese chocolate
And large umbrellas. And a motley green
Followed the drift of the obese machine

Of ocean, perfected in indolence.
What pistache one, ingenious and droll,
Beheld the sovereign clouds as jugglery

And the sea as turquoise-turbaned Sambo, neat
At tossing saucers—cloudy-conjuring sea?
C’était mon esprit bâtard, l’ignominie.

The sovereign clouds came clustering. The conch
Of loyal conjuration trumped. The wind
Of green blooms turning crisped the motley hue

To clearing opalescence. Then the sea
And heaven rolled as one and from the two
Came fresh transfigurings of freshest blue.

i’m… down w Wallace Stevens, though i can’t say i love him.

oh jesus, but Nile Rodgers. i can definitely say i love him. i saw him and his band, Chic, perform at Outside Lands on the very same stage in the very same meadow where i’d seen Beck, M. Ward, and Devendra Banhart play in 2009. Nile killed by a mile. and that’s saying quite a bit since i loved all three of those shows in 2009. like, really really loved. but what can top…

9475712977_127ce768f6_b

this man’s guitar.

holy shit from the very first second to the very last, this was a performance. first of all, the man just walks out on stage to make sure his guitar and monitors sound right and everything. just casually walks up, dressed in pure snow white w black dreads hanging low, and starts working. the band joins him, and they start playing some ambient funk noise. this eventually descends into a deep crashing tremor, as the two female vocalists walk out to join the rest of the band. then the party starts.

they play Chic, they play Diana Ross, they play David Bowie, they play Sister Sledge, they play Sugarhill Gang, they play Chic. and then, when they’re all done, they put down their instruments and lead everyone into a “Get Lucky” dance party. album version.

be still, my lucky heart. Continue reading

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montaña

the trip: https://maps.google.com/maps?saddr=San+Francisco,+CA&daddr=reno,+nv+to:Twin+Falls,+ID+to:bozeman,+mt+to:Livingston,+Mt+to:Yellowstone+National+Park,+Mammoth+Hot+Springs,+Park,+WY+to:Madison+Campground,+Yellowstone+National+Park,+Yellowstone+National+Park,+WY+to:Grand+Prismatic+Spring,+Grand+Loop+Rd,+Yellowstone+National+Park,+WY+to:Bridge+Bay+to:Black+Dragons+Caldron+to:Grand+Canyon+of+the+Yellowstone+to:Tower+Falls,+Yellowstone+National+Park,+Park,+WY+to:Yellowstone+National+Park,+Mammoth+Hot+Springs,+Park,+WY+to:Silver+Gate,+Cooke+City-Silver+Gate,+Mt+to:Lily+Lake,+wyoming+to:Red+Lodge,+Mt+to:East+Rosebud+Lake+to:Bozeman,+Mt+to:Salt+Lake+City,+UT+to:Cottonwood+Heights,+UT+to:San+Francisco,+CA&hl=en&ll=45.135555,-109.660034&spn=2.332783,4.927368&sll=44.085612,-111.346436&sspn=1.187668,2.463684&geocode=FVJmQAIdKAe0-CkhAGkAbZqFgDH_rXbwZxNQSg%3BFaEsWwIdVcnb-CmdoJKSrkCZgDGH9zh0zsXFQA%3BFZd1iQIdOXct-SmvbrLFpKOsVDGqwfgs7HfLJA%3BFQQTuQId_YBh-SkTiLpPTERFUzGqYDv3ZND1Yw%3BFeK8uAIdLP1o-SkjR6AnvhNFUzFMjIRaJjKWRQ%3BFWdJrgIdn9pm-SmTip7xDdRPUzEivO2MPaFCKg%3BFaw7qQIdLWRk-SHBkZCfc_PzXylp4V9GjMNRUzHBkZCfc_PzXw%3BFSlmpwId_b1k-SFEDigKVP2Vkyn1R8IPvOtRUzFEDigKVP2Vkw%3BFWGNpwIdhCNr-SkDg3iVAx1OUzEd4aKdP0elCw%3BFbrZqAIdaONq-Sk54oy7KB9OUzE57x-bctnMHg%3BFdX9rAIdtsxr-SmLJZWTozZOUzFW-0sS9T6UWA%3BFaAFrQIdAKBr-SnZG8ZgqDZOUzE6nzHh-HWx9Q%3BFWdJrgIdn9pm-SmTip7xDdRPUzEivO2MPaFCKg%3BFSTArgIdA7Fx-SnXSLRtWFROUzEXWfq8dJ9Jhw%3BFZnWrQIdkPB1-Sn7L_MIfPpOUzE4M1PUmK_Vrw%3BFfJ6sQIdmwZ9-Sn1_Eb3GSpPUzEL1yB19jWKtQ%3BFcGosQIdGvp2-SnBGDBmxRhPUzFD9bOX3UlzNA%3BFQQTuQId_YBh-SkTiLpPTERFUzGqYDv3ZND1Yw%3BFcv1bQIdma1U-SntMdGIlD1ShzHKMU1IoLdTWw%3BFUzJawIdm9FV-SknMety2mJShzFAIhqeYpUiBw%3BFVJmQAIdKAe0-CkhAGkAbZqFgDH_rXbwZxNQSg&oq=san+fr&t=h&mra=ls&z=8 Continue reading

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favorites from Hatch’s Order of Magnitude: Methodical Rankings of the Commonplace and the Incredible for Daily Reference by a Man of Extraordinary Genius and Impeccable Taste

Degrees of Life Milestones, In order of importance from least to greatest (37)

  1. Birthday
  2. Anniversary
  3. Sweet 16
  4. Driver’s license
  5. Twenty-first birthday
  6. Third marriage/life partnership ceremony/ordination
  7. Graduation (middle/secondary school)
  8. Over-the-hill party
  9. Coming-of-age ceremony (Bar Mitzvah, Quinceañera, debutatante ball, Kovave)
  10. Graduation (high school)
  11. Second marriage/life partnership ceremony/ordination
  12. Graduation (college)
  13. Retirement party
  14. Graduation (Master’s degree)
  15. Graduation (doctorate)
  16. First marriage/life partnership ceremony/ordination
  17. World-class achievement (Nobel Prize, Oscar, Fields Medal, Pulitzer, Olympic Gold Medal, Super Bowl Championship)
  18. Coronation/taking presidential oath of office
  19. Death and funeral
  20. Birth
  21. Birth of one’s own child
  22. Apotheosis

Sex by Voracity (40)

  1. Make sweet, sweet love
  2. Make love
  3. Do it
  4. Have sex
  5. Pork
  6. Fuck
  7. Bang
  8. Rail
  9. Ravage

Happiness to Sadness, as Expressed in Emoticons (57)

  1. :.D
  2. :.)
  3. =D
  4. :D
  5. =)
  6. :)
  7. :P
  8. :|
  9. :\
  10. :s
  11. :(
  12. :.(
  13. D.:

The Obscenity Continuum (68)

  1. Darn
  2. Damn
  3. Ass
  4. Dick
  5. Pussy
  6. Cock
  7. Shit
  8. Fuck
  9. Cunt
  10. Ethnic-specific term with negative connotation

Instant Messenger Laughs (73)

  1. eh
  2. heh
  3. ha
  4. hah
  5. haha
  6. lol
  7. Lol
  8. LOL
  9. LOL!
  10. LOLOLOL
  11. LOLLOLOOOLLASDFSDFlfdsjkalhk!!!!!
  12. LMAO
  13. LMFAO
  14. ROFL
  15. Roflcopter
  16. ROFLMAO
  17. ROFLMFAO

Digits in Order of Expendability (78)

  1. Little toe
  2. #4 toe
  3. #3 toe
  4. #2 toe
  5. Pinkie
  6. Ring finger
  7. Middle finger
  8. Big toe/great toe/hallux
  9. Index finger
  10. Thumb
  11. Penis

Breast Size (78)

  1. Mosquito bite
  2. Tittles
  3. Miglins
  4. Nuglins
  5. Titties
  6. Tits
  7. Boobs
  8. Hooters
  9. Perfect
  10. Melons
  11. Gazongas
  12. Boulders

It Does Matter: Penis Size (78)

  1. Clitoris
  2. Peepee
  3. Willie
  4. Prick
  5. Schlort
  6. Wand
  7. Weiner
  8. Ding-dong
  9. Penis
  10. Wang
  11. Dick
  12. Johnson
  13. Package
  14. Cock
  15. Schlong
  16. Meat
  17. Slab
  18. Thud
  19. Third leg

Degrees of Self-Proclaimed Restaurant Notoriety (86)

  1. World Famous

The Cartoon Hierarchy of Intimidation (107)

  1. Mouse
  2. Cat
  3. Dog
  4. Lion
  5. Elephant
  6. Mouse

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wet desert

in which the Hero attends the 7th anniversary desert party. Continue reading

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